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true love
Dear Reader,

If we base our idea of what true love is on fairy tales, we might think that finding prince charming or an enchanting princess and living happily ever after is the ultimate goal. But for most mortals, striving for such ideals is unrealistic, and may even leave us feeling unfulfilled or let down. The reality is that being and staying in love takes continual work and patience, even though this might not seem utterly romantic, in that storybook sense. Couples who have healthy relationships find ways of working together, and this in and of itself could be considered a sign of true love.

It's true that in many cultures, people who are "in love" create long-term partnerships and/or get married. We may hear of the high divorce rates, but lots of these couples do actually stay together. Yes, there are couples that have been married for 60 years and still feel passionately in love, and there are others who care deeply for one another even though the lust is gone (or maybe never existed!). Of course, sometimes we may not even want to hear about the happy, lovey-dovey couples because we're feeling romantically unlucky or lovelorn ourselves.

Keep in mind that the reasons why some relationships don't last are as varied as the different kinds of people we are; in many cases, the partners simply grow apart because they have grown and changed as individuals, and seek different, more fulfilling opportunities for love. If a particular couple "falls out of love," yet each partner goes on to seek a more satisfying love with another person, could this be an example of "true love" in action?

Love can also vary by degrees: some couples feel deeply intense and passionate, while others appreciate one another for intellectual reasons or admire one another's ambition, dedication, or creativity. When is the last time you read a fairy tale where the main characters appreciated each other's brilliant musicianship, eloquent writing, or compassion for humanity? (Well,

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