Dating and the Single Parent
Christine R. Rykhus
L25966345
Book Critique
Dating and the Single Parent
Dr. Ken Nichols
PACO 603 D02
Summary
In the book Dating and the Single Parent Ron Deal walks the single parent through the process of dating again. This book is broken into three sections. Section one has five chapters and is titled “Getting Past the Butterflies and Warm Fuzzes.” In the beginning Deal starts with “Dating in a Crowd: Dating with Purpose.” (29) With this in mind the reader begins to understand you will be dating the entire family. Deal describes different types of daters, and warns the reader against the “Consumer daters who want guarantees” (44) about the dates. These consumer daters want the dates to be their all in all and meet their every need. Deal also describes the thought of “Mirror, Mirror on the Wall; Am I Ready to Date? (47) This section describes “the impact loss has on you, and your willingness to surrender to God’s direction regarding divorce and remarriage.” (58) While determining if you are ready to date; Deal lists the readiness factors: can you handle being alone, trusting in God, looking at past issues, and asking the questions like, “What in my past can I not shake?” This is getting yourself and kids ready for dating. While thinking of fear as the main hurdle in beginning to date, Deal suggests you not “sidestep” (83) your fear but “acknowledge it.” (83) Not only your fear but how to handle the kids’ fears and concerns in the dating world. Deal explains “When a parent dates, kids feel the shift in direction away from them and the family; this ignites their fear of more loss.” (98)
The second section of the book is called “Going Fishing” (115) and talks about finding love. “Finding love in all the right places …and in all the wrong ways” (117) talks about defining the relationship or the DTR; there are three ways to look at relationships; we need to learn when to yield, stop or run with yellow, red and green lights. “Going deeper” (163) reminds us
L25966345
Book Critique
Dating and the Single Parent
Dr. Ken Nichols
PACO 603 D02
Summary
In the book Dating and the Single Parent Ron Deal walks the single parent through the process of dating again. This book is broken into three sections. Section one has five chapters and is titled “Getting Past the Butterflies and Warm Fuzzes.” In the beginning Deal starts with “Dating in a Crowd: Dating with Purpose.” (29) With this in mind the reader begins to understand you will be dating the entire family. Deal describes different types of daters, and warns the reader against the “Consumer daters who want guarantees” (44) about the dates. These consumer daters want the dates to be their all in all and meet their every need. Deal also describes the thought of “Mirror, Mirror on the Wall; Am I Ready to Date? (47) This section describes “the impact loss has on you, and your willingness to surrender to God’s direction regarding divorce and remarriage.” (58) While determining if you are ready to date; Deal lists the readiness factors: can you handle being alone, trusting in God, looking at past issues, and asking the questions like, “What in my past can I not shake?” This is getting yourself and kids ready for dating. While thinking of fear as the main hurdle in beginning to date, Deal suggests you not “sidestep” (83) your fear but “acknowledge it.” (83) Not only your fear but how to handle the kids’ fears and concerns in the dating world. Deal explains “When a parent dates, kids feel the shift in direction away from them and the family; this ignites their fear of more loss.” (98)
The second section of the book is called “Going Fishing” (115) and talks about finding love. “Finding love in all the right places …and in all the wrong ways” (117) talks about defining the relationship or the DTR; there are three ways to look at relationships; we need to learn when to yield, stop or run with yellow, red and green lights. “Going deeper” (163) reminds us
References: Deal, R. (2012). Dating and the single parent. Bloomington, MN: Bethany House Publishing. Eller, W. (2001). Evangelical dictionary of theology. 2n ed. Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Book House. Marano, H. E., Divorced? Don’t even think of remarrying until you read this. www.smartmarriages.com. Accessed November 8, 2014.