A Modern Modest Proposal

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A Modest Proposal for Disposing Homelessness in the United States
Every city or town I have ever visited is affected by the plague of homeless people. The most apparent places where the severity of homelessness is displayed are major cities in the United States, such as New York City, Chicago, and Los Angeles. Although the official number of homeless people in the United States is unknown, everyone can attest to the volume of homeless people that they have encountered in their lifetimes. It is a sad fact that our incredible country is subjected to such eyesores inhaling our hard-earned money, and I believe that this must be stopped. Not only are homeless people taking our resources, but they are also putting a strain on all of our hearts and minds, as we feel bad for these individuals’ circumstances. As American citizens, it is our duty to protect the integrity of our nation and always work towards a better life; this is why we must enact my plan to use homeless people to our advantage. My solution to our homeless problem is a simple one; we shall auction off all homeless people to wealthy Americans as slaves.

To enact this plan, we will collect the homeless people off the street either willingly or by force, since this plan will be truly beneficial to them. After collecting all homeless people, we shall have auction houses setup in soup kitchens and shelters, seeing as they will no longer be used for their original purposes. We shall primarily auction the homeless people to the wealthy Americans, but if needed, we may sell the individuals to people from civilized countries. When homeless families are brought to the auction houses, they will be sold as a unit; however, only immediate relatives will be sold together, such as parents or guardians with their children. Any children that are auctioned will be required to attend school during the week and work twenty hours for their masters and work full –time on weekends. This law is essential for it will ensure...
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