What Is My Faith in the Future?

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What Is My Faith in the Future?

By | May 2009
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What is my faith in the future? This question is worded so openly that I am not very sure how to approach it. When I hear the question “what is my faith in the future,” even though it sounds extremely selfish, the first thing that comes to mind is me. I am worried about me, and how I will turn out. So far in this class, I have yet to find a topic that really allows me to open up, until this one (unless I understood and answered the question incorrectly, if so, my apologies). In some cases I feel like an outsider because the things I think and feel are so different than my other peers. What they find funny leaves me puzzled; What they find interesting I see as boring; I feel as if I am an opposite to everyone else in the class. Imagine a old black and white photo of a party, and imagine in that black and white picture there is just one person in full color. I am that person in color.

I could lie and say my faith in the future is for all of us to be peaceful, that we will not have war or hunger, but the truth is, the future leaves me puzzled about myself. I realize a lot of people get excited from the idea of not knowing their future and being able to do whatever they please, but personally, the idea scares me. It is difficult for me to have faith in the future when everything just seems so overwhelming. Seeing my friends talk about they’re majors and what they want to do in life really makes me realize how much I need to progress. I’m 18 years old (almost turning 19), and I have no idea what I want to do with my life. I do not have any goals, interests, desires, I just feel like a paper weight sometimes. It does not help when you have nothing in particular at which you excel in; Everything seems so uniform for me. Do not get me wrong, this is not the kind of depression that leads to suicide, I just feel as if I am not living my life to the potential it has.

Year after year, everything feels like the same old dance and song. In some aspects, I really did nor...

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