Verbal and Non-Verbal Communication: Ten Weeks to a Better Relationship

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Marriage Course -- Part 1 – Expectations
Ten Weeks to a Better Marriage Relationship

Ten Weeks to a Better Marriage Relationship
Part 1: Expectations
Part 2: Fighting Fairly
Part 3: Work on Your Listening Skills
Part 4: Financial Concerns
Part 5: Conflicting Chores
Part 6: Marriage Sexuality
Part 7: Cinema Therapy
Part 8: Get to Know One Another Better
Part 9: Celebrate Your Coupling
Part 10: Take the Dialogue Challenge

Marriage relationships need fine tuning from time to time. Even couples in great marriages can find themselves taking one another for granted or feeling in a bit of a rut. Over the next ten weeks, this series of articles will lead the two of you through steps that could enhance your marital relationship.

Talk About Your Expectations

Unrealistic Expectations Have to be Faced
everyone has expectations. However, unrealistic expectations will end up being direct paths to disappointment and unhappiness in your marriage. These include having false expectations, believing in the myths about marriage, thinking that someone else can make you happy, trying to read one another's mind, wanting to do everything together, and wanting to have a perfect marriage. When these are not identified or verbalized, they can create great barriers in your marriage. Hopefully, your expectations will include being able to lovingly resolve conflicts, to appreciate your differences as individuals, to respect and cherish one another, and to be able to discuss values and priorities.

Having unrealistic expectations of marriage can bring a couple to the point of wanting to call it quits. Expectations need to be verbalized with one another.

Expectations can lead to Disappointment

Is your marriage on the brink of divorce? Does the grass look greener on the other side of the fence? Are you disappointed because your marriage isn't what you expected it to be? Do you think other marriages don't experience boredom, loneliness, cheating, or lack of sex? Do you believe in a perfect marriage? Do you think your spouse can make you happy? Are you thinking about leaving your marriage? Are you having thoughts of divorce? Do you find yourself thinking "Is this all there is?" Is the sense of spontaneity and spark missing in your marriage? Are you resentful towards your spouse? Do you feel like you are drowning? Disillusionment in Marriage

The level of happiness doesn't change once you walk down the aisle. Problems won't magically disappear. Being able to make a decision to love and to move beyond the feelings of disappointment or resentment is a major key in having a long lasting marriage.

Paths to Disappointment and Unhappiness
False expectations,
Believing in myths about marriage,
Thinking that someone else can make you happy
Trying to read one another's mind
Wanting to do everything together
Losing yourself, and wanting to have a perfect marriage are direct paths to disappointment and unhappiness. Ways to Get Out of Disillusionment
* Put yourself at the top of your to do list.
* Make a decision to love.
* Discuss one another's expectations about your marriage. * Ask for what you want.
* Accept that your marriage isn't perfect.
* Hug and kiss your spouse often.
* Don't let anger take over.
* Find out what's going on in your own life.
* Don't be manipulative or allow yourself to be manipulated. Don't Forget the Positive
Marriage is usually joyous, fulfilling, and fun. Sometimes in the midst of daily living, you may forget the positive aspect of being in a marriage relationship.

Myth 1:
Love is all you need to have a successful marriage.
Truth: Although love is extremely important in your marriage, to have a successful marriage, your relationship needs much more. Myth 2:
Your spouse should fill your needs.
Truth: Although everyone has emotional needs, expecting your spouse to fill all these needs is unfair and unreasonable. Myth 3:
You can save your...
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