Grouping the Styles Anger 1. Masked Anger 2. Explosive Anger 3. Chronic Anger 1. Masked Anger – Anger is masked when people don’t realize that they are angry or when they severely underestimate their anger. 2. Explosive Anger – People with explosive anger are know by the quick, exaggerated & sometimes dangerous character of their anger. 3. Chronic Anger – People with chronic anger stew in their anger for long periods. They can’t let go of their anger as easily as those with any of the other styles.
ANGER STYLES QUIZ
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 I try never to get angry. I get really nervous when other are angry. I feel I’m doing something bad when I get angry. I tell people I’ll do what they want, but then I often forget I say things like “yeah, but…” and “I’ll do it later”. People tell me I must be angry but I’m not sure why. I get jealous a lot, even when there is no reason. I don’t trust people very much. Sometimes it feels like people are out to get me. My anger comes on really fast. I act before I think when I get angry. My anger goes away very quickly after I explode I get very angry when people criticize me. People say I am easily hurt and oversensitive I get angry when I feel bad about myself I get mad in order to get what I want I try to scare others with my anger I can pretend to be very mad when I’m really OK. Sometimes I get angry just for the excitement or action I like the strong feelings that come with my anger. My anger takes over and I go out of control. I seem to get angry all the time. I just can’t break the habit of getting angry a lot. I get mad without thinking – it just happens I become very angry when I defend my beliefs Yes Yes Yes Yes Yes Yes Yes Yes Yes Yes Yes Yes Yes Yes Yes Yes Yes Yes Yes Yes Yes Yes Yes Yes Yes No No No No No No No No No No No No No No No No No No No No No No No No No
26 27 28 29 30
I feel outraged about what others try to get away with. I always know I’m right in an argument. I hang onto my anger for a long time. I have a hard time forgiving people. I hate people for what they’ve done to me.
Yes Yes Yes Yes Yes
No No No No No
10 WAYS TO OVERCOME ANGER Questions 1-3: Anger Avoidance
Sally says she’ll meet Joe for lunch. But she doesn’t show up. It’s the third time in a row, but is Joe angry? Of course not. He never gets mad, he says, Joe would feel like a bad person if he got angry. Anger avoider doesn’t like anger much. Some avoiders are afraid of their anger, or the anger of others. Anger seems too scary to touch. They’re scared of losing control if they get mad, of letting out the monster inside them. Other avoider thinks that it’s bad to be angry. They’ve learned sayings like “Only doge get mad” and “Be nice, don’t be angry.” They hide from their anger because they want to be like. Anger avoiders gain the sense of being a good or nice person because they don’t get mad. That helps them feel safe and calm. Anger avoiders have problems, though. They often don’t feel anger even when something is wrong, so anger doesn’t help them survive. Also, they can’t be assertive, because they feel too guilty when they say what they want. Too often the result is that they are walked over by others.
Questions 4-6: SNEAKY ANGER
The church ladies are calling again. They want Ruth to make sandwiches for 100 people next week at the social. Ruth has other plans, but she says OK. The day of the picnic comes, and no Ruth. She just forgot, She explains when they call, and now there isn’t time. Too bad, but they’ll have to do something else. Anger sneaks never let other know they are angry. In fact, sometimes they don’t even know how angry they are. But the anger comes out “sideways” when they forget things a lot, or say “Yeah, but…” over and over instead of doing anything, or when they simply sit around and frustrate everybody in their families. When others get mad at them, anger sneaks can look hurt and innocent. “Why...