Shared Talking Styles
COM200: Interpersonal Communication
April 22, 2013
If you share a talking style with someone you are more likely to enjoy being around them more. An interesting concept to think about, but it’s just like having the same opinions and thoughts as someone else. The study I read about studied couples in a speed dating situation, when the people shared a similar talking style they were more likely to go on further dates together. The research showed that the more the talking styles matched the more the pair was paying attention to each other. “Unconscious verbal coordination of this sort, dubbed language-style matching by the researchers, signifies not how much two people like each other but how much each is paying attention to what the other says, Ireland and her colleagues propose in an upcoming Psychological Science.” (Bower). Similarly when two people are locked in a fight against one another they also show signs of similar talking styles, even when they appear to hate one another. I believe this is because when you hate someone you want to appear more intelligent than the other person, and in turn that person is trying to sound smarter than you, but as the conversation persists and the argument continues the more likely the conversation is going to go down the verbal toilet. “"An interesting irony is that two people who truly hate one another will often exhibit a high amount of language-style matching," Pennebaker says.”Two people locked in a bitter fight tend to talk, or yell, in similar ways." Mostly, though, highly attentive conversation partners like one another.” (Bower).
The article goes on to say that friends may use different verbs and nouns when talking about a subject but they use similar function words to get their point across to their friend, and that friend in turn uses the same or similar functions words as well to forward the conversation and to connect with the other person.
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