Sexual child abuse kills the spirt of any child and distorts their thinking. I know first hand; I’m the daughter of a molested victim. Even though I was never molested myself, I know the impact it has had on my mother, and that effected me. How can one be a parent when their own parents did such a heinous things to them? How can one try to get over the fact that they lost their innocence when they were just under ten years old? How does an adult act when they were molested as a kid? What is the impact? Millions of children in the United States have been molested. When can they begin to change and stop blaming themselves? The struggles of getting over such a trauma are vast, but people have done it. I am a witness.
The prevalence of childhood sexual abuse in our society is quite high. When defined as sexual contact, ranging from fondling to intercourse, with a child normally between five years old to mid-adolescence, the sexual victimization rate is generally around thirty five percent for females and twenty percent for males. Most sexual abuse offenders are acquainted with their victims; approximately thirty percent are relatives of the child, most often fathers, uncles or cousins; around sixty percent are other acquaintances such as friends of the family, babysitters, or neighbors. Strangers are the offenders in approximately ten percent of child sexual abuse cases (Charles S. Clark par. 8-9). The impacts of sexual abuse have been studied in more detail than those victims who have been physically or psychologically abused. John N. Briere, author of Child Abuse Trauma: Theory and Treatment of the Lasting Effects, states, “ In one clinical sample 133 women with sexual abuse histories, for example, seventy-seven percent had been penetrated orally, anally, or vaginally, fifty-six women had also been physically abused, and seventeen percent reported especially bizarre victimization including ritualistic abuse, multiple simultaneous perpetrators, and insertion of objects” (pp. 4-5). This crime is so common into today’s society, it’s sad to think about. In a different study, lead by Diana Russell, 930 women in the general population revealed that eighty percent of those sexually abused as children felt somewhat to extremely upset at the time of the abuse, and seventy-eight percent reported experiencing negative long-term psychological effects ( 5). In my mother’s case, she felt both.
Stabbing Westward is a band that plays very deep and powerful songs which I tend to like, but when this song came on, I felt pain, misery, and heartache for what my mother went through. Here is a passage from the song, Sleep by: Stabbing Westward:
“She stares intently at the door, Listens for his footsteps, She knows exactly what's in store, And the knowing makes it worse, When he calls her daddy's little girl, She doesn't hear him, When he crushes her She can't feel her screams are silent, Hides in the corner of her mind, Where she plays contently, She leaves this nightmare far behind, She escapes inside her dreams, Floating high above her bed, Staring at her father's head, Wishing one of them were dead, So this hell could finally end.” It sums up what my mother went through. She was only two years old when her biological father committed suicide, but only six months after his death, her mother remarried. The man her mother married was a heartless beast, a waste of space and a perverted sick man. The sexual abuse didn’t start until she began third grade. It started off as him pretending to be a “good step-father” in which he would read my mother “bedtime stories”. The touching and fondling began. He would tell my mom to be “ a good girl” and would force her to caress his genitals. It started getting worse. He would then sneak into her room at night, undress himself, and start touching her in places no man should touch. This became a routine for her, along with anytime her mother was absent from the house....