March 3, 2010
Complications of Relationships
According to the author Deborah Tannen the article, “Sex, Lies, and conversation; Why Is It So Hard for Men and Women to Talk to Each Other?” men and women perceive conversations in their relationships to be differently. She states that lack of conversation is wreaking havoc within marriages. This is due to the fact that men and women have very different expectations of communication. “Linguistic Battle of the Sexes” describes how men and woman act different in public places. She states, “American men tend to talk more than women in public situations, they often talk less at home.” This pattern she describes is wreaking confusion and imbalance in their interests. When it comes to relationships men and woman have many communication problems starting from childhood.
Differences in communication start in the childhood socialization. Children’s expansion is most inclined by the social arrangement of interaction with their age group. For young girls, conversation is the start of friendship. By sharing secrets, thoughts, feelings, and impressions, girls and women build intimacy in their relationships, while young boys build relationships by doing activities together. Young boys are more general with each other, creating larger groups of friends. In boys relationships there is less chatting and more competing. Within these large groups, boys compete with each other to avoid the lower position in the groups.
Misalignments in conversations between men and women lead to a consciousness of not listening. When men talk they periodically glance around the room and women assume they are not listening even though they really are. Woman exchange stories at length about problems or family, while men jump from one topic to another along with competing by playing games or telling jokes periodically.
Men have the tendency to switch topics while communication with others. Women in...