Satire Essay

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  • Topic: Technology, The Circuit
  • Pages : 6 (2414 words )
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  • Published : October 3, 2009
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Technological Obstructions!
To whom it may concern,
The year is 2111, and technology resides in the heart and soul of every person’s life. As civilization has advanced, humans have come to depend more and more upon inventions and creations. I fear mankind will simply never be able to release the stranglehold of technology, but as it has improved, the way of life has improved along with it. The only problem is, what if everything stopped working?

Signed, Dr. Bijan Khaksari
The class of 2111 had a scheduled field trip to the museum of obsolete technology. When the students arrived at the museum, they signed in to receive their educational hours. "What's this?" one student asked, picking up a bulky, square device. "That's a blackboard eraser," answered the tour guide, "it was used to erase chalk from a blackboard." To demonstrate, the tour guide wrote a few words on an ancient wall called the "blackboard", using a strange white substance called "chalk." She then made the writing vanish with the eraser. The students laughed. "What a waste of time," Greg Cohen exclaimed, "they could have just pressed the delete key." As the student’s ventured thought the museum, they were thoroughly uninterested with the display of educational technology from the early 21st century. Some students were flabbergasted when they witnessed a hologram of people sitting in bizarre devices called "desks.” The students were even more stunned to see these people listening to a professor and writing down comments in paper filled objects called a "notebooks." Other equipment on display included a shockingly inefficient data collection device called a 'textbook,” which many students had never heard of. The guide soon began speaking again. “This museum focuses on the early 21st century because of the dramatic educational changes that began in this era. As many of you students know, online education has been around long before any of you were born. Educators with visions knew online education would soon replace the ancient classroom model. Many educators were reluctant to let go of the teaching model that included a professor actually standing in front of a room full of students, and verbally providing them with information. As technology developed, however, educators quickly realized the inefficiency of this information system, and by 2050, almost all classrooms in the United States were no longer in use.” The student sighed, as they had already learned all of this information online during their history course, which focused mainly on major technological advances throughout the past fifty years. The students proceeded to view some of the early technology that led to today's advances, such as the “Smart board.” Greg began to read the caption out loud. “Smart Board. Although little is known about this object, it was said to be useless and far too expensive. After years of frustration with this board, it was retired from the classroom altogether. This board allowed a teacher to draw out information to their students and project it on a screen.” Greg laughed hysterically at the foolish concept of such a silly object, and dismissed the idea as obsolete. The guide continued on with her speech. “In 2010, Microsoft and Mac joined to create the revolutionary KnowledgeMaker 360 software, which allowed entire academic departments to move their classes online. And after Wikipedia published its trillionth article in 2021, it was clear that lists of Wikipedia articles would replace textbook readings forever.” Many students had finally had enough of their schooling today, and decided to fulfil their education hours later. Greg had to return to his day job anyhow. While putting on his nametag, Greg exited the museum in a haughty fashion and advanced down the crowded street, not making eye contact with anyone. The grey booths along the street meant it was freedom of information day, the eight day of the week. After the economy collapsed more than...
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