Respect: Writing and Contradictory Subject

I must admit that when I was first assigned this essay, I was not exactly excited about it. Five thousand words is a lot to write! Especially on such a contradictory subject! I can see how someone might interpret the previous sentence as being disrespectful in and of itself, but that is not my intention.
Let me explain. As a soldier in the United States Army, excuses are neither tolerable nor acceptable. It is for that reason that my assigned topic, “why I was being disrespectful towards you,” is not something that I plan to address. The way I see it, doing so would waste my effort, your time, and paper. Not to mention it directly goes against some of my most important values: honesty and responsibility. It would be immature and morally unacceptable for me to try to fill an entire essay with excuses that could not and would not be true because, honestly, there is no excuse for what I did. I broke the rules that I knew were in place and I will not attempt to explain away my disobedience and disrespect. All I can say in regards to what I did is that I apologize. I really do. I dont know how difficult it can be to be thrown into the platoon seargent position as an E-5 with next to no training. Anyone willing to step up to that kind of responsibility deserves more respect than what i have shown

As I miserably contemplated how I would be able to complete the task of writing such a long essay, I had a change of heart. Usually I try to make the best of a situation so writing this should not be any different. I had two options. I could either treat writing this essay like a punishment. Or I could treat writing this essay like an opportunity. Like an opportunity for me to learn something about myself and for you to learn something about me. I'd prefer the latter. This way, I might even get carried away in writing this and enjoy it. And I'll keep my fingers crossed that my optimism continues as I get further and further along. Though I