Based on the Book and Workbook by Ken Sandle
Conflict Resolution is an essential element of life but a task filled with so many diverse issues that not many can engage it without feeling a bit unprepared. Through the grace of God we have been given a wonderful ministry of reconciliation and direct commands to live at peace with others. The core outcome of this project is to allow you to practice the principles of conflict resolution laid forth in the Peacemaker text.
For the purpose of the Peacemaker project, I would like to deal with the conflict between Les Robinson, a deacon in our church, and myself the church pastor. The problem is Les’ personal life is affecting the ministry of the church. Les is forty-six and has been married to married to Sister Sabrina Robinson for six years and together they have three adult step children. Before they were married, Les was released from his position as a probation officer with the State of California.
As a result of the things that have happened as a result of Les’ decisions he’s now negative to his wife. He doesn’t see how his behavior is affecting the church. He drives to church in a different vehicle and doesn’t acknowledge his wife at any point in the worship service. Furthermore, whenever he addresses her it is always in a harsh and demeaning manner. On one particular occasion, after a minister finished preaching, he asked everyone to hug someone. Les was standing next to his wife; he never turned to her, but walked right pass her and hugged someone else. His wife broke down and started crying.
Because of actions like this, members in the church could not follow Les and therefore, has been removed from the deacons’ ministry. The purpose of this project is to address the issue with Les and to help heal the ministry of the church.
Part one: Glorify God
Section one: Conflict Provides Opportunities
The conflict started when Les decided to marry his wife. Before getting married, Les was released from his position as a probation officer in the State of California. In my personal view, this is where it all began. He connected that event to the decision that he made. He could have told to himself that if he didn’t decide to marry his wife, he could’ve retained his job.
He started to become cold to his wife, not doing things that a husband should be doing to his wife. These actions negative actions, being a deacon of the church himself, create a negative impact on the church itself. But moreover, it affects Les himself and his family.
I have used the peacemaking response to conflict. I have used reconciliation specifically. I’ve used a loving correction in order to appeal to the wrongdoing of Les. I decided to use this approach because of the seriousness of the situation. I believe my response would be at first would affect him negatively but in the long run, I suppose he would be able to realize my concern.
I would glorify God because whatever I do, I do it for the glory of God. And even if my decision might be unpopular to some, I do this because it is a good deed so then it would glorify God. As it was written in 1 Peter 2:12, though they accuse you of doing wrong, they may see your good deeds and glorify God on the day he visits us.
I would serve others through this conflict by restoring him gently as what Galatians 6:1-2 says. I could be tempted in doing so; tempted to judge the person or to be angry but this should not be the case. I should share that person’s burden meaning I should understand what he is going through and not judge him with what he is doing.
I would grow like Christ because I would put off my old self that is corrupted by my worldly desires. This would make me weak because I am used to with this ways. But then, I would put on my new self who is created in true righteousness and holiness. I know that this...