No Old People

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  • Published : March 10, 2013
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Modest Proposal
Many people can agree with me when I say that we use a lot of our money on old people. Us Americans work hard for that money and we are just giving it up to help support the elders across the nation through Social Security and Medicare. What do we get in return for this noble act? Nothing, we get to watch the old people soak up our money and not give us anything back. So, I created a simple solution to this problem. Once a person hits the age of 62, we just end their life and see them no more. That would end the complaining of young Americans who do not want to give their hard earned money to a bunch of old sacs who sit around and do nothing. Plus it would help the flow of the money and create a better economy. The average age for retirement is the age of 62, so usually when you turn this age you are done working and just sitting at your house for the rest of your life. This age signifies the moment of laziness and greed for most people. All of the old people are just going to want to receive their checks in the mail to help them get through the rest of their life without doing anything except for sitting in their rocking chairs and working on their gardens. We cannot let this continue and create a bad image for our future Americans. We need to show them that one cannot just lazily sit around and still receive money. We have to make a point that we will never stop working and once you do, it is over with you. Killing a mass amount of old people would not be an enjoyable thing to do, but it would be necessary. I am not saying that we should kill them in terrible ways. I believe that a simple poison addition to their pudding will do the job. It would be quick and painless, plus there would be no mess to clean up. After they have passed we could dig a giant hole to bury all of the bodies in so we do not run out of space for the younger people. There would be a proper burial ceremony because we do not want to be inhuman about this act and everything...
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