Masking Poor Communication

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  • Published : June 20, 2011
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Reflecting on this article, I agree with its contents. As we get closer in a relationship, we dismiss the fact that we could be misunderstood by each other on certain situations or certain scenarios. “Getting close to someone appears to create the illusion of understanding more than actual understanding” (Health Day 2011). When this happens, we can become angry with the spouse because we expected them to understand what we meant or said. As couples, we want to believe that we are on the same page all the time because we are so close. Whether we are face to face, back to back, in another room, or on the phone with each other, misunderstanding can and will happen without further questioning from the other spouse. When something is said, it is the other spouse’s responsibility to make sure they are clear in what they are hearing. Without this tactic, there will be misinterpretations between the spouses. This creates unhealthy communication between the spouses. My Fiancé Kevin and I were able to communicate beautifully the first two and half years of our relationship. Then my granddaughter needed to come and live with us. Her name is Victorya and she has been with us since September of 2009. He never had children of his own, so helping to raise Victorya was a whole new world for him. At first, he was ok with it. Then he started going through all kinds of changes because of it. He would say, I support you in anything you do. Then he would vent like crazy about our life not being the same anymore. I tell him, it’s only temporary, but after a year and a half he still can’t handle the change. When he says his life is over, I just want to take my granddaughter and leave so he can have his life back. I feel responsible for his misery, and I don’t know how to fix that. His explanation for his actions is, he doesn’t want to get attached. I tell him it’s too late because he is already attached. “Communication moves in two directions, each person takes on the...
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