Use the following rubric to analyze the language analysis paragraphs in response to Rodriguez’s narrative. Be certain that you can discuss each paragraph element described in the rubric for each response.
(optional) The writer provides an anecdote, allusion, quotation, statistic, or other device to introduce the essay and/or capture reader interest.
The writer constructs an effective topic sentence.
a. The writer highlights a critical rhetorical feature that is essential to the passage’s effectiveness.
b. The writer effectively conveys the passage’s theme.
The writer assertively explains the use of figurative
language/rhetorical features in the passage.
a. The writer does not use adverbs such as “probably” or weak verbs to refer to the author and/or his or her work or
message such as “may have been thinking” or “may be
trying to convey.”
The writer analyzes how the use of figurative language/rhetorical features enhances the meaning of the text.
a. The writer links his or her analysis back to the idea(s)
presented in the topic sentence.
The writer has a conclusive sentence and/or idea at the end of the paragraph.
The writer uses a well-constructed and interesting sentence
structure to convey his or her message.
The writer has few to no errors in grammar, usage, or mechanics (GUM).
Rodriguez and Tone
Rodriguez uses crestfallen alliteration and heartsore dialect to illustrate the sadness and pitty he feels for his mother. In this way Rodriguez sets the tone of silent whispers and hushed questions. When talking about his mother, and his past, Rodriguez, exemplifies this when he uses the shushed alliteration of the soft "s" sound. When he states that "she seems, all of a sudden, very small", it doesn't seem like a statement to be said out loud. The "s" sounds make it seem like a whisper in the wind of something sad and unnoticed by most. It's almost like a secret that Rodriguez wants to keep to himself. Although, because he seems to be the only one to sense the smallness she feels, he's tempted to ask her about it,but only "quietly". When using dialect he also displays the same tone about his mother. Rodriguez makes her words seem sad and frail. Especially, when she says "someday", as if she hopes that someday in the future, things will still be the same as today. When Rodriguez's mother says that it's just "another Christmas", it's the same thing. It's just "another Christmas", because by now, they are all the same, devoid of any feelings that she had hoped that "someday" would hold.
In the passage by Richard Rodriguez, Rodriguez uses longing imagery, and intense diction to portray the sadness Rodriguez has for his mother and the realization of how family is important. "Uncomfortable warm" presents an unnormal state and is discomforting as a reader. It is used to foreshadow the rest of the passage. "She seems, all of a sudden, very small" incorporates the sadness of everyone leaving, the ending of the exchanging of gifts like the old times and it makes her "worried". "Shiny mink" shows the happiness of gifts and the life of all the family together. The "thinness" brings the emotion of mourning, for Rodriguez realizes, the family time with his mother and father is dwindling. With growing up means the passing away of loved ones and a new generation of family.
H:\AP Lang\07 Essay\Language Analysis\Rodriguez\Rodriguez Paragraphs Rev. 10.05.doc
Rodriguez uses objective and somewhat indifferent diction in describing his family Christmases. He uses little feeling in describing his parents, realizing at the end of the day that the only words he hears from his father are to ask if he is "going home now." He sees his mother "waving toward no one in particular," but does nothing to acknowledge her presence. Rodriguez's simple description of the Christmas...
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