Letting Go

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Letting go. It is difficult for us in so many ways and on so many levels. Yet life calls upon us to do it, over and over again. Letting go is part of our growth process. We cannot move on to the new while continuing to cling to the old.  

  There come times, in the context of love and romance, when we must learn to let go. For some of us, as described in the song, we must let go of a past romantic relationship. Maybe the relationship was not meant to be: perhaps it was hurtful to us, or perhaps it was hindering the personal or spiritual growth of one or both partners. In this case, even when there may still be feelings of passion, or attraction, or just the comfort of the familiar, we must be strong in letting go of something that is unhealthy for us. … Perhaps we have no problem leaving the person behind, but we continue to harbor animosity. In this case, we need to let go of the anger: holding onto anger does not serve us - and it might even serve to create problems in our physical health or emotional well-being. … In the realm of romantic relationships, some of us need to let go of unrealistic expectations. Whether we have idealized a past relationship or just read too many romance novels, some of us need to let go of the myth of the perfect lover: the fantasy of a relationship that requires no work and just brings us "happily ever after." By letting go, I am not implying "to forget" or "to ignore." By all means, we should carry with us the happy memories and the lessons we have learned from our past relationships. However, we need to let go in the sense of releasing emotional baggage we may be carrying around with us, so that we may be open to, and present for, a new relationship.   Some of us have difficulty letting go of a friend or loved one who has passed away. I have known mothers who have lost a young child who never seem to cope with this loss, emotionally: they carry it with them for years, like a dark and ominous cloud that -- even on a sunny day -...
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