You would never guess what? Oh, I am so happy, confused and sad. What to do, I know not. I never knew one moment would change my life so quickly, and drastically! I have to tell you the most exciting news first...I'm getting married! Oh, can you die of happiness? My mother has just put upon me the proposal to ‘The County Paris’. When I was told the news my life flashed before my eyes, I saw myself in a loveless marriage, sitting at home in old clothes, slaving over a hot stove all day and looking after the children, what kind of a future is that? Getting married is an honour that I do not dream of, because it shows you are wanted and the older you are, the less likely you are to get married and men won’t give you a second glance. I never even thought that anyone would find me interesting. Father has stated clearly that he will only agree to this marriage if it is what I want as well. If I do agree to marry now then would I have to slave after Paris? Massage his shoulders and his feet every time he returns from somewhere? Urrghh, I can just imagine my destiny entwined with him..... Does Paris want children? What if he’s using me for that purpose alone? That ghastly thought just gives me shivers running through my body repeatedly. This may be a little difficult as I have seen it with mother and father. Paris is good-looking and quite rich for my liking. Is mother eying his money? If that is so, then that would be outrageous, but who am I to believe such nonsense?
I wonder what will happen after I’m married off to live with my father and mother in law. Would it be scary and awkward? I knew my time would come soon; I don’t know what to do or what to think. I don't want to disappoint my parents, but truly feel marriage, at this stage in my life, is not truly what I want at this moment. I am not ready to make such a huge commitment and get married very hastily. Does Paris really and sincerely love me enough to want to marry me? Is it something he just...
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