How to Be Vain

Topics: Abuse, Aesthetics, Intimidation Pages: 3 (857 words) Published: December 18, 2007
How to be Vain
The me, me, me culture is unquestionably vogue. With last season's trend of subtle exhibitions of vanity quickly nearing an end, you should stop hiding those intense feelings you feel about yourself and make sure you do not hold back. First off, if you have imperfections of any sort, make sure you pursue any needed aesthetic surgery or treatment to obtain maximum perfection. Next, show how much you cannot get enough of yourself. Finally, constantly mention how much you intimidate both men and women, physically, verbally and mentally. It is necessary that you go all out to be properly vain and share the joy of your self-love with us all, by simply perusing the following tips.

Not everyone can be born perfect, which is why those who wish to portray the utmost amount of vanity must engage in artificial beautification. It is important to seek out a cosmetic professional to complete one of those ever so quick, painless and perfect surgeries that you may often see on television. All it takes is a short trip under the knife, scalpel or syringe. Tummy tucks, nose jobs, botox and boob jobs would be just a couple of crucial procedures that you will need to practice complete vanity. Now, if your just want a short-term solution to any facial imperfections, simply go for a couple of pounds of foundation, followed by a tonne of cover-up and finished with a kilogram of bronzer. For those vain women with smaller breasts, how about trying an extra-padded push-up bra? For maximum impact add a sock in each cup to "grow" an extra size. If questioned about the peculiar cloth that may accidentally peek out of your brassiere, act dumbfounded as to how on earth it ended up there. Now, for male beautification, there are always nose jobs, enlargements of your "member" and even botox. After a few short modifications, you'll be as good as new and ready to embrace your perfection.

Make it clear to anyone you associate with how wonderful and truly perfect...
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