How Nice Guys Can Succeed
The traditional business philosophy holds the opinion that the nice guy won't get as far up as the cold competitor in the corporate ladder. Nevertheless Russ C. Edelman, coauthor of “Nice Guys Can Get the Corner Office” believes otherwise. He gets several strategies for how nice employees and their companies can finish first based on his survey.
They surveyed about 350 nice guys to discuss how they felt about themselves and their performance and get their viewpoints and 25 top executives to define the organization cost of the existence of too many too-nice managers in company in practical work. Among the nice guys surveyed, 61% hold the opinion that they were too nice at work, 36% thought successful people as "balanced", 41% would prefer to be "effectively nice" or balanced guys and 50% believe their managers are overly nice. The stories and strategies of the surveyed managers also substantially influenced the content of the ideas of this book.
Based on these dates, the author develops eight strategies (also eight chapters that make up the core of the book) for the nice guys and also includes a section on incorporating the strategies company-wide: Self-awareness, Speak up, Set boundaries, Confront, Choose, Expect results, Be bold and Win.
Self-Awareness: Know your Strengths and Weaknesses.
Based on the stories of Ben and Trent, The author summarized three symptoms related to a lack of self-awareness : Self-Delusion，which is particularly insidious for nice guys , Self-Denial, which becomes even more problematic when it triggers self-denial , and Pattern “Unrecognition” since overly nice guys have a difficult time recognizing that they are displaying clear self-defeating patterns.
Facing with these problems, what is the strategy for nice guys? The author gives us the answers. Firstly, personal inventory since it is an honest appraisal of their habits, skills and personal characteristics. Secondly, Optimize, because it is best for overly nice guys to optimize their personal assets and give paly to their strengths. Last but not least, intention, create a vision and set goals to manifest the life you want.
As far as for the nice company strategies, the author gives 2 advices: Inventory controls and War Stories. These means that the company can incorporate practical guidelines or controls into your evaluation programs to allow overly nice guys in the company to develop higher level of self-awareness and gather people together to share business and personal stories in meaningful ways.
In terms of me, I really lacked of self-awareness when I was an internship in China Mobile Group since it was my first time to work in large enterprise and I thought I was really weak among these staffs and was pessimistic for the reality, I did the work not only for the marketing department which I served for and also for others just they told me that “Shaobo Li, I need your help” ,since I want to please everyone in the enterprise ,I worked so hard to finish every task whether I was responsible for it or not. But this action made me really exhausted and I even cannot finish my assignment. Based on the above personal experience, I deeply realized that I was a representative nice guy when I was an internship , I believe I would be more optimistic and set the goal to manifest the life I want after I totally understood the meaning of self-awareness.
Speak Up: Learn to Express Your Opinions and Be Heard
Due to several reasons such as fear of being judged, sense of unworthiness, lack of confidence in speaking ability and inability to really listen and so on, nice guys always choose to not to speak up. Take the story of Ray for example, which I have a profound impression, Ray, who is an overly nice guy, hesitated to take any action to subordinate since Ray concerned for the family situation of his subordinate. It is a typical case for the nice guy syndrome.
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