Homecoming: Reclaiming and Championing Your
By: John Bradshaw
Name: Jessica Klassen
Instructer: Megan Phillips
Date : December 20, 2012
Course: Working with families
While reading the Homecoming: Reclaiming and Championing Your Inner Child by John Bradshaw, it has given me great detail into how the wounded inner child will affect someone as they grow into adulthood. It gives you insight, on how to conquer and overcome your wounds that you had growing as a child and how to work through those emotions, so you don’t turn into the person you feared the most, in your childhood. How a wounded inner child begins.
As John Bradshaw states in his book, all wounded children carry their wounds with them into adulthood. If a child is still struggling and not healing from their childhood, they will produce those actions and emotions throughout their life until they have gone through the healing process. The more we know about our childhood and wonder where our creativity and imagination went to, they more we do our best as adults to get it all back. There are ways to prevent our wounded inner child from tagging along in our adulthood, as well as, into our own families and to our children. Wounded inner child can contaminate your life
Many people do not understand how an adult can still live in their childhood body, they don’t understand how someone can still act out like they did as child and figure that there is something wrong with the individual themselves and not on how they were brought up and their parents. John Bradshaw used many different mnemonic formulas, in this part of the book he used contaminate;
Co-dependence, Offender behaviours, Narcissistic Behaviours, Trust issues, Acting out/Acting in behaviours, Magical behaviours, Intimacy dysfunctions, Non-disciplined behaviours, Addictive/compulsive behaviours, Thought distortions, Emptiness. He talks throughout the first part of the book all the effects that these behaviours and feelings have on a child and how they may take it into their adulthood. I will go over a few and show how it will affect a child as well as a, adult. Magical Beliefs
There are many saying, words, gestures or behaviours that have us as child believe in this “magical belief”, for example, “Step on a crack, break your mothers back”, “your killing your mother!”, “If my lover leaves me, I’ll die or I’ll never make it”, along with many more. Many fairy tales are about a man and women finding their identity, when we are a wounded child, we continue to take these stories literally. We wait and search for our happy endings, because we lean on these magical beliefs to get us through the tough times, waiting for the day to come where they are true, we see life no other way when our inner child is wounded. Intimacy Dysfunctions
Adults and children move back and forth between the fear of abandonment and the fear of engulfment. A wounded inner child, let oneself to get completely comfortable with a person they are believed to love, but once they realize what is happening or if one negative situation comes between the relationship, they go back to their childhood and think of the worst, because that is all that they were taught and how they saw the bad ending of being with someone and loving someone. They usually go by the saying, “Everybody leaves/hurts us”, wounded adults, 3.
usually miss out on all life has to offer, for the fact they are scared of the hurt and abandonment they felt as a child. Addictive/Compulsive Behaviours
Growing up with non-healthy parents can cause a child to follow the footsteps of their parents. If your father was an alcoholic there is a likely chance that you will become an alcoholic if you didn’t heal from that memory as a child. All addictions have a thinking component, which is called obsession. Being trapped in an addictive behaviour can also lead to your own feelings being addictive. If you’re...
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