Friends of a Certain Age: Why Is It Hard to Make Friends Over 30?
written by: MV
Analysis of article.
This article talks about the challenges of making friends and the changing nature of friendship after entering the 30’s. In today’s world people are busy with jobs, education, family, care-taking and spending whatever free time they have working on themselves and their relationship with their partner. In this day and age of technology, communications with friends have changed, giving an individual many different ways to say “Hello”. As a person hits their 30s and 40s they come across many new people through work, socialization and Facebook, but none of them are actual close friends, the kind you make in college. As individual’s age priorities change and people often become pickier as they develop a sense of self understanding causing them to set their bars higher. However, this realization strikes when they encounter a big life event and recognize the need for true friends. Many individuals get preoccupied with their family and work that they fail to realize that they have no life outside it. Laura Carstensen a psychologist professor noted that people tend to interact with fewer people as they approach midlife , but grow closer to the friends they already have. The reason behind this is because as people turn 30 their internal clock goes off reminding them of their decreasing lifeline, as they realize this they concentrate more on their present. Some sociologists believe that as individuals get older, it becomes tougher to meet the 3 conditions that are crucial in making friends: Proximity, repeated and unplanned interactions. These three elements provide a setting that encourages people to let their guards off and trust each other, which is why the best of friends are made in college. As you hit 30’s you enter the professional world, where maintaining “proximity” becomes difficult and the only time you can interact with your friends is either through...
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