I’m very frustrated today. Father doesn’t agree that we should go back to Berlin. “Karl’s not here and Daniel’s not here and Martin’s not here and there are no other houses around us and no fruit and vegetable stalls and no streets and no cafes with tables outside and no one to push you from pillar to post on a Saturday afternoon.” This place is just horrible. But I am shameful that I spoke to father in such disrespect. I didn’t really mean it, I just wanted father to know how horrible this place is and how nobody is ever going to happy here and we should really move back to the house in Berlin. I was really surprised that I shouted at father, I didn’t even know that I was going to shout at father. It was a complete surprise to me. I thought father was going to get really angry and I was even ready to make a run for it but nothing seemed to make father angry today. If I were to be honest with myself, I would have admitted that father rarely became angry. Instead he became distant and quiet and always had his way in the end anyway and rather than shouting at him or chasing him around the house, he just shook his head and indicated that their debate was at an end. Before leaving father’s office I asked him a final question but there was no point because I didn’t even understand what he meant. I asked him about the people that I can see from my bedroom window and he said that they aren’t even people. So who could they be? Father also said that I have nothing in common with those people and should stay clear from them. Then our conversation was finally to an end. I wish we go back home quickly and meet grandmother and grandfather and of course, my friends.
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