Definition of a Football Fan
Football fans are by definition crazy. They behave insanely; they are insane about the past, and they are insanely loyal. If their team gives away something free, the fans rush to the stadium to get the hat or watever. Football fans just plain behave insanely. Baseball fans go similarly nuts when their favorite teams give away some attractive freebie. But football fans are even worse. Football fans freeze themselves in order to watch their favorite game. In addition, football fans decorate their houses with football-related items of every kind. When they go to a game, which they do as often as possible, the true football fans make themselves look ridiculous by decorating themselves in weird team-related ways. At the game, these fans do the “wave”more than they watch the game. Football fans love to talk about the past. They talk about William “Refrigerator” Perry’s 1985 Super Bowl touchdown as though it had happened last week. They still get all exicited about 1988’s “Fog Bowl”. They talk about John Elway’s final game as though it’s today’s news, though it happened in 1999. They think everyone should be as excited as they are about such old stories. Last of all, football fans are insanely loyal to the team of their choice. Football fans never wear their team T-shirts and warm-up jackets everywhere, even to work. Of course, if they have to dress up in business clothes, they can’t do that. Should their beloved team lose three in a row, their fans may begin to criticise their team. They still obsessively watch each game and read all the newspaper stories about it. This intense loyalty makes fans dangerous. To anyone who dares to say to a loyal fan that another team is better, or, God forbid, to anyone wandering near the home cheering section wearing the jacket of the opposite team, physical damage is a real possibility. Incidents of violence in football stadium have increased in recent years and are a matter of...
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