Life Art Project – Science and Human Values
The College of New Rochelle
December 19, 2010
“A wife who loses a husband is called a widow. A husband who loses a wife is called a widower. A child who loses his parents is called an orphan. But … There is no word for a parent who loses a child, that’s how awful the loss is!” (Neugeborn, 1976) “The death of a child is a traumatic event, perhaps more than the deaths of other family members” (Fletcher, Paige 2002). "Medical and moral decisions must be made. But there's no written directive for guidance" (Grossman, 2009). "Every day, in a hospital somewhere in the USA, a group of strangers — the hospital ethics committee — is called in to help people make the choices of a lifetime" (Grossman, 2009).
The tragic death of my first child Nikole, born with a heart disease called Hypo-plastic Left Heart Syndrome had a lasting effect on me and my family. As a recently married twenty-one year old, having a child seemed like something I was ready for, but I would have never expected the events that followed. When she was born, through the swelling and maternal fluids she was beautiful, but more importantly, she was mine. This is when I first learned that “love at first sight” did exist. I loved her because she was now part of my whole life. She seemed perfect; she had big brown eyes, black hair and cute smirk. Later on the following day, my husband and I learned that our daughter was born with one of the rarest heart diseases that affected newborns, Hypo plastic Left Heart Syndrome (HLHS) where the aorta and left ventricle are not fully developed, and the cause is still unknown.
At this moment my life took a wrong turn. I became angry and the pain I felt in my heart made me numb towards others. I could not understand why God did that to my baby, why God would not cause me pain but cause her so much pain and suffering as well. What did either of us do to deserve such a tragedy?... [continues]
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