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Can We Talk

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Can We Talk
Effective communication is definitely important in a relationship. If you are not communicating effectively what exactly are you and your spouse or significant other talking about ? I found that self-disclosure is important because knowing personal and private things about your spouse makes you feel closer. For example my fiancé disclosed some sensitive information that I can’t discuss in this paper. But knowing this about her made me feel connected in a sense. Not to mention that it allowed me to have better problem solving skills when she has an issue or emotional breakdown. When this happens I know what to do and how to react.

The only similarities that I can think of between genders is the fact the me and my spouse want to be complete honesty with each other. We both want happiness, equality and respect. We both love children and would like a happy home. I’m pretty sure there are many more but that is what comes to mind.

The term used in the article was “generalizations”. I feel this term should be switched to “stereotypes”. Even though most of us don’t believe in stereotypes, unfortunately currently or at one time or another we all have fit a stereotype or to. I agree that I am a stereotypical man when it comes to emotions and the way that I interact with my spouse. Terri Orbuch (2011) says "affective affirmation" -- basically, behavior that makes your partner feel loved, cared for or special -- plays a role in happy marriages and that men need it more than women. Affective affirmation can be as simple as a hug, a thank you or buying a partner's favorite food. Men tend to favor gestures of affirmation over words, Orbuch says. Women tend to go with verbal affirmation” (Orbuch, Terri (2011) Tribune News Service “Can we talk”) retrieved from http://search.proquest.com/docview/840600645?accountid=32521

I find myself agreeing with her statements about affirmation. This is what makes me happy with my spouse, so yes I can say that I fit into these

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