Business Communication

Topics: Following, Revision Pages: 2 (432 words) Published: March 24, 2011
REDUNDANCIES, JARGON, SLANG, CLICHÉS. Revise the following sentences to eliminate the redundancies, jargon, slang and clichés, and any other wordiness ExampleFirst and foremost, we plan to emphasize an instructional training program. revision First we plan to emphasize an instructional(or training) program. 1. Last but not least, Troy collected together as much support material as possible to avoid getting burned in cash losses or bottom-line profits.

2. It was the consensus of opinion of members of committee that the committee should meet at 11a.m in the morning.

3. If you will refer back to the contract, you will definitely find that there are specific specifications that prevent anyone from blowing the budget.

4. This memorandum serves as an advance warning that all books and magazines borrowed from the library must be taken to the library by June 1.

5. In view of the fact that our last presentation bombed, we are at this point in time convinced that we must include only the most absolutely essential selling points this time.

6. In the normal course of events, we would wait until such time as we had adequate enough credit reports.

PRECISE VERBS. Revise the following sentences, centering the action in the verbs

ExampleThe webmaster made a description of the project

RevisionThe webmaster described the project.

1. Mr. Thomas gave an appraisal of the home’s value.

2. Can you bring about a change in our company travel policy?

3. Web-based customer service will produce the effect of reduction in overall cost

4. In writing this proposal, we must make application of new government regulations.

5. The board of directors made a recommendation affirming the abandonment of the pilot project.

6. An investigator made a determination of the first damages.

7. We hope to have production of our new line of products by January.

8. The duty of the comptroller is verification of...
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