It was my worst experience because I was too young and unprepared for having a child. I was 18 when I learned that I would be a mother. It struck my mind as I did not expect this and it was not in my plan to have a child in such an early age.
The period of pregnancy was very difficult for me. First of all change of appearance, gestational toxicosis, the feeling that I am not alone anymore and there is one more human being inside of me – this all happened for the first time with me. I did not know what to expect from the next day, and there was nobody to help me and to inspire me. Secondly, I was financially insecure, and it is a common knowledge that a pregnant woman needs more vitamins, has to visit her doctor often and take care of herself. I had no education and that was why I did not have a well-paid job. My expenses grew rapidly, and I was often afraid that one day I would run short of money. But this was not what frightened me most of all. The thought that I would not have money and enough knowledge to keep a child almost killed me.
When Ambria was born new problems and fears aroused. Firstly, I was afraid that I did not know how to treat her, that I would do something wrong that would harm my child. The thoughts and feelings of my inability to be a mother were difficult to bear but I managed. Though I did my best to do everything correctly I understood that I had to get education and a good job. I had to become financially secure in order to continue my life and to provide Ambria and me with everything we need. But I also realized how difficult for me it would be to pursue any goals with a little child in my hands. I spent all my time with Ambria and almost had no time to do anything else.
But though it was my worst learning experience, at the same time it was also my best... [continues]
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