Being Gay

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Being Gay: What the Filipino Parents Should Understand About the LGBT About 3 days ago, I have read an article in the Philippine Star advising parents on what to do when they have a gay child. It was written by a local journalist, Tintin Bersola-Babao according to her interview with a “noted psychologist.” The article details how parents should stop all the effeminate ways of their children and how to tell them that they are what “God” made them and they must live a family with only the opposite sex in the future. Phrasing my last sentence that way is an understatement on how the article abhors the LGBT and limits a child’s choice on his own sexual identity, but at least, you have a hint of where I’m coming from. This essay is entitled “Being Gay,” the same title as that of the said article I have read to parallelize the contentions of what should the parents do to their gay child according to the perspective of a “noted psychologist” who speaks of the word of her god (I still don’t know which god she has been referring to all those times, though) rather than the word of her profession and someone from the LGBT and is happy that his parents never did what the article advised them to do. On the choice of “Being” Gay

First of all, the title of the article has expressed a belief that the author, under her mind, has the idea of gayness as a state of being rather than a stigma. You, parents should be able to understand that homosexuality is not an imposed consciousness that your children have to live with, because nothing should be imposed on them, to begin with. They live their own lives according to what they inherently have, not that someone has inflicted them with characteristics and told them what they should be just because the bible says so. You should let your children explore the horizons of their sexuality than impose an identity that you want your children to have.

Your child’s identity is a product of the choices they made, the challenges they faced, and the trials they conquered. In order to positively maximize your child’s personality, s/he should not be limited to the out dated social norms and concepts of morality. These things stop them from being who they really are like a box that imprisons them in the shadow of others. Without giving them the freedom to discover their own ‘self,’ children further develops confusion on their own sexuality. They will question themselves because they deviate from what you told them to be, worse, on what they can see and get from the society. Even you prohibit your gay child to be effeminate, his inner “gay” self will still manifest, one day or another. That is because once again, gayness is a state of being. You can’t strip that aspect of your child off them. That is who they are. The least you can do is to accept them, nurture them, and support them. Besides, whatever they will become, they are your children. On the guarantee to heterosexuality

The first thing to comprehend on the issue of homosexuality and effeminacy is that a child’s preference on clothes or toys doesn’t suggest their sexuality. There is no guarantee to heterosexuality of a boy who loves sports and toy guns or a girl who acts genuinely lady-like. As children, their choice on toys depends on what you give them or what they see in the media. There is no such thing as an instinctive preference on things like these; it’s the society that is telling us that girls should play with Barbie dolls and boys should play with toy guns.

In the same line of thought, a boy who’s playing with Barbie dolls doesn’t suggest his homosexuality. He might be playing with dolls because he admires their beauty or he wants to be a doll maker or fashion designer in the future. A girl playing with toy guns might want to be in the military someday or an action film actress. The point here is that children are way beyond what we see on them. You should be able to accept your child beyond what is seen by the naked eye. Regardless...
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