Autiographical Incident

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A Message to All Earthlings from Your Friend Tudor the Just
People of Earth, warmest and friendliest greetings! I am Tudor the Just and I come from Neptune, as you know if you have been watching the news. By the way, I want to congratulate all of your TV networks on their coverage of my landing. They

did a galaxy-class job. It made me think about how much
your reporters deserve the chance to cover real news—like
the explosion in Cluster H356pi or the rebellion on Altair 7. The truth is, all Earthlings deserve be1 err. That is why I’m here. I want to give Earth the opportunity to step up to a
higher level by becoming a Registered Protected World
of the Neptunian Guild—because you need us.
We Neptunian’s have been watching Earth’s progress
for a long time. It has warmed our hearts to watch you move
forward. We remember when you were primitives and your
own feet were your only means of transport. Now you are
sending rocket probes toward our own home world. In our
councils, we have spoken of your destiny. You are a young
species, but you have made rapid strides. Our great leader,
Roots the Wise has decided that you are worthy to share
in the wisdom of older, more mature planets. Therefore,
we have contacted you ahead of schedule because Roots
he has decreed it. If you apply to become a Registered
Protected World, there is a good chance you will be accepted on your fi rest tries! Any intelligent species would be proud of such an honor. As a Registered Protected World, you will have all the advantages of Neptunian civilization without the burdens of being a Neptunian. (Let’s face it; my planet is cold!) The great Neptunian Space Fleet will be on guard continuously, making sure no invader can approach your atmosphere. Neptunian ships will arrive to transport Earthlings to Neptunian cities and towns as part of our Exchange Program. You see, our tradition, the noble and age-old Neptunian creed, is not to conquer but to serve. Each new planet we land on is...
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