A school performance of A Midsummer Night's Dream is coming to a close. The Mendelssohn soundtrack blares from a tinny loudspeaker. Kids dressed as fairies scurry about in garish light. The music ends and the fairies strike a tableau. One of them, TOM, steps forward and addresses the audience.
TOM/RICK ROY/HOTEL GUEST/ FIRST CAMPKR/MC MEG/LEONIE GWEN/HOTEL GUEST JIM/HOTEL GUEST CORAL/SECOND CAMPER H A R R Y / H O T E L GUEST/THIRD CAMPER VIC/HOTEL GUEST/FOURTH CAMPER/MISS LATROBE
MODERN TRANSLATION: If we actors have offended you, just think of it this way and everything will be all right—you were asleep when you saw these visions, and this silly and pathetic story was no more real than a dream. Ladies and gentlemen, don’t get upset with me. If you forgive us, we’ll make everything all right. I’m an honest Puck, and I swear that if we’re lucky enough not to get hissed at, we’ll make it up to you soon. If not, then I’m a liar. So good night to everyone. Give me some applause, if we’re friends, and Robin will make everything up to you.
TOM: If we shadows have offended, Think but this, and all is mended, That you have but slumbered here While these visions did appear. And this weak and idle theme, No more yielding but a dream, Gentles, do not reprehend. If you pardon, we will mend. And, as I am an honest Puck, If we have unearned luck Now to scrape the serpent's tongue, We will make amends ere long; Else the Puck a liar call. So, good night unto you all. Give me your hands, if we be friends, And Robin shall restore amends.
Music again, the FAIRIES scurry about and the curtain closes. It opens again and they are caught unready. They form a line and bow a few times, the curtain closes again and they...