14 Points

Topics: Fuck, Profanity, Need Pages: 3 (706 words) Published: December 10, 2012
The 14 points of getting a girl with a boyfriend to sleep with you. Fuck you Wilson!
* Lie all the time
* Sex = love (in her mind)
* Cheating/fucking is the goal
* Never mention an ex girlfriend
* Make her feel like the “only girl in the world”- Beyonce (John Moran’s contribution) * Let her talk a lot, chicks like talking
1) Niceness
a) Don’t be too nice
b) You have a dick. Don’t chop it off and attach a pussy. c) You’re not her girlfriend and you don’t want to be d) You’re a guy who wants to fuck her
i) Introduce yourself
ii) Make small talk
iii) Ask if she has a boyfriend, if not proceed to step 14 2) Let her complain about said boyfriend
e) Don’t always agree otherwise your plan will be foiled f) Chicks dig it when you care
g) Don’t mention any other girls
3) Act like you care
h) Don’t overdo it
i) Act like a guy
j) Show that you want to help, compassion is key
k) Become the best actor you can
iv) You don’t have to be a drama club fag (Brendan Michaelis) to pull this off 4) Tell her what you would be like as a boyfriend
l) Make yourself seem like God
m) Compliment her
n) Be creative!
5) Change conversation topic
p) “Don’t try and eat the cake while it’s still baking” q) This separates you from most other guys, don’t go for a frontal attack because you’ll get slaughtered r) Don’t forget chicks are smarter than us, they can figure out our plans too(only applies to some chicks) s) Don’t stray too far, but stray far enough

v) There’s a happy median
6) Get back on topic (whenever you feel comfortable)
t) Subtle is key, mention his name or something, ask I wonder what he’s doing right now? Probably fucking some skank. u) Plant the seed
v) Watch her reaction if she doesn’t want to talk...
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